I don't understand how people can call themselves "Christian" and then treat children, or anyone for that matter, so terribly. It seems so hypocritical. My mother had a lifelong friend who went to church every Sunday, etc., but broke up a woman's marriage by having an affair with the husband, got pregnant, then forced the man to divorce his wife , leave his family, and marry her. I learned of this when a teenager and could/would never think of behaving this way.
This made me sad. My adoptive father also a devout Catholic was harsh with me too. He demanded perfection in school, my chores and obedience. My mom did not stand up to him either. Eventually, I did.
Yes. It was. Later on in life he apologized for being harsher on me than his two bio children, my half siblings. He felt overly responsible that I turned out good.
Mary Ellen Gambutti: My daughter and my son-in-law are loving parents of two boys and adoptive parents of a wonderful girl, then 8-months, now 17-years, from Hunan (in China).
She is well loved by all, including us grandparents.
We have a long-departed friend, who passed away at about 70 years of age, who was adopted and well-loved.
I don't understand the cruelty of your adoptive father at all.
As a devoted Catholic myself, who grew up under Pius XII and the Baltimore Catechism, I have never identified with the authoritarian, but rather with the Jesuit and meditational tradition.
I am very sorry indeed you grew up with sanctimonious, weak persons.
I appreciate your careful reading and observations. I can only guess it was the combination of his Edwardian upbringing, and personality (drive type A?), and seriousness of military rank/responsibilities as an intelligence officer and, post-retirement, a CIA chief in LA. He was a loving (if not dominant) husband, and a welcoming father, until I was in grammar school. There were many issues with my mom, too. I invite you to read my memoir, I Must Have Wandered: An Adopted Air Force Daughter Recalls. Thanks! Mel
I don't understand how people can call themselves "Christian" and then treat children, or anyone for that matter, so terribly. It seems so hypocritical. My mother had a lifelong friend who went to church every Sunday, etc., but broke up a woman's marriage by having an affair with the husband, got pregnant, then forced the man to divorce his wife , leave his family, and marry her. I learned of this when a teenager and could/would never think of behaving this way.
This made me sad. My adoptive father also a devout Catholic was harsh with me too. He demanded perfection in school, my chores and obedience. My mom did not stand up to him either. Eventually, I did.
I'm happy you found the courage to do so, Doreen.
I'm sorry it made you sad, Doreen, although glad my piece resonates. It was another time. Peace, Mel
Yes. It was. Later on in life he apologized for being harsher on me than his two bio children, my half siblings. He felt overly responsible that I turned out good.
Mary Ellen Gambutti: My daughter and my son-in-law are loving parents of two boys and adoptive parents of a wonderful girl, then 8-months, now 17-years, from Hunan (in China).
She is well loved by all, including us grandparents.
We have a long-departed friend, who passed away at about 70 years of age, who was adopted and well-loved.
I don't understand the cruelty of your adoptive father at all.
As a devoted Catholic myself, who grew up under Pius XII and the Baltimore Catechism, I have never identified with the authoritarian, but rather with the Jesuit and meditational tradition.
I am very sorry indeed you grew up with sanctimonious, weak persons.
Thank you for sharing so deeply of yourself.
I appreciate your careful reading and observations. I can only guess it was the combination of his Edwardian upbringing, and personality (drive type A?), and seriousness of military rank/responsibilities as an intelligence officer and, post-retirement, a CIA chief in LA. He was a loving (if not dominant) husband, and a welcoming father, until I was in grammar school. There were many issues with my mom, too. I invite you to read my memoir, I Must Have Wandered: An Adopted Air Force Daughter Recalls. Thanks! Mel
Such pressure on you to be perfect! I remember those glow in the dark crucifixes and their magic. Such a mixture of beliefs for a girl. 💞
Thanks so much for reading, Kate, and for your kind comment!🥰